The whole health and wellness movement is seriously having a moment right now. From self-care to mental health, it’s at the forefront of everything from Instagram to psychology publications. But, there’s one big aspect that’s largely left out of the conversation, and that’s sexual health.
Which is why I’m so excited to change that with today’s guest post! Mia is another anonymous blogger (yay!) who writes about sex and sexuality on her site, Come to Mia.
I have to admit, finding another anonymous blogger was an interesting experience. I found myself immediately curious about what she looked like (so hypocritical, I know!) But, she built her blog as a safe space to talk freely about sex and sexual pleasure, so I totally get it. Her blog is amazing and I highly suggest you check it out. You can also find her on Instagram with the handle @cometomia.
Keep reading to find out more from Mia about caring for your sexual health.
How To Care for Your Sexual Health
If you’ve been on social media lately, you’ve probably noticed the plethora of hashtags telling us how we can take better care of our health. But, so much of the self-care conversation glosses over something most of us engage in: sex!
Sex is an integral part of our lives and well-being, yet we talk more about how to be sexier rather than how to care for our sexual health.
What is Sexual Health
The CDC defines sexual health as ” physical, emotional, mental, and social well-being in relation to sexuality.”
Sexual health is about avoiding STD’s and getting knocked up by that one-night stand you thought was cute after 5 tequila shots, but that’s not all of it. It also has an emotional and mental aspect.
And sex is such an integral part of our overall well-being. It’s part of our identity. So, learning how to care for our sexual health is crucial.
As a woman, I’ve been taught that my body and sexual experiences belonged to someone else, for someone else to enjoy. But being sexually healthy means taking matters into your own hands.
It’s about understanding your body, speaking up for yourself, communicating effectively with partners and doctors, and not shaming yourself (or others) for the desires and urges you experience.
How to Care for Your Sexual Health
Now that you know the importance of it, here’s how you can integrate sexual health practices into your daily life.
Unlearn Unhealthy Messages
We are taught to be ashamed of our sexuality. That sex is a taboo subject. And this sexual oppression from society has led to plenty of negative ramifications (domestic violence, sexual assault/harassment, and the persecution of LGBTQ+ persons to name a few.)
To care for your sexual health, you need to start by unlearning the myths about sex. For one thing, you are allowed to enjoy pleasure. Sexual urges and fantasies are natural.
Learn More About Yourself
Start learning more about your body and sexuality without any negative nuances hiding behind it. You can start doing this by learning more about your anatomy. That’s right, I am talking about your genitals.
Get comfortable with them, and explore them along with your body. You can try masturbating in different positions, buying sex toys you’ve always been curious about, watching different types of (ethical) porn, or even reading some erotic fiction.
You can discover how you feel as you do all these things. Do you feel nervous? Excited? Be open-minded to the possibility that your sexuality isn’t what you initially thought it was. With so much to explore, you can choose the pace right for you.
When we hear safety within the context of sex, we think about preventing STIs and unwanted pregnancy. That’s a good initial thought but let’s take it further.
Try developing a safe sex strategy or learn how to find suitable partners and identify red flags and signs of abuse. And learn about the resources near you, such as STI clinics and crisis centers.
Protecting yourself also implies going to the doctors to get wellness checks done and test for STIs. Doing this ensures that you are caring for not only your sexual health but also for the person you are hooking up with.
Practice Good Communication
We’re always hearing that we need to communicate better, so what better way to start than by talking about your sex life!
Some key people that need to be included in this conversation are your doctors, your partners, and other healthcare professionals.
I know how scary it can be to talk to your doctor about slutting it up every weekend and getting tied to the headboard, but trust me, it’ll be worth it. This conversation will help your doctors determine the best treatment plan for you. Whether that be choosing birth control or treating unintentional/intentional injuries.
As for your partner, learning how to express your desires will ensure that you experience a healthy sexual relationship.
Communicate to them how you’d like to experience sex, what things you want to try, likes/dislikes, and most importantly, whether or not you want to have sex. You should never be coerced into having sex just because your partner wants to.
Finally, if you have any sexual trauma is best to talk to a therapist. Now that we understand that sexual health has an emotional factor, we must recognize any trauma related to the subject and face it.
Above All Else, Love Yourself
Sex is a human experience, and it’s essential to understand that everyone (not just those you identify with) has the right to experience safe, pleasurable sexual experiences and fulfilling relationships.
Caring for your sexual health means loving yourself enough to arm yourself with the knowledge that could protect your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
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Being able to care for all aspects of your health and wellness is undeniably important. So, I want to thank Mia for sharing this fantastic post.
What do you think is the most important part of caring for your sexual health? Let me know in the comments below!
As always, thanks so much for reading! And if you’re interested in writing a guest blog post for me, I’m always open to collaboration – find more information here.
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